I am 23. I'm married and have two kids. I didn't plan my life to be so full, so soon. But, I am devoted to making all concerned as happy as possible ... which means, I'm taking a utilitarian standpoint. I'm not getting much of what I wanted. I'm happy because I'm making them happy. I think I can live with this choice ... but, I have trouble from time to time - overwhelming urges to be totally selfish, haunting thoughts of an old flame (who still has feelings for me, after five years), etc. I'm currently having trouble, NOT because I plan to act on my feelings, MORE SO BECAUSE I can't stop these feelings of love for this other man. What do I do? Please, please, help. I don't want to disrespect my husband, family, or myself. But, I want so much of what is forbidden, and I can't stop thinking about it.
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